


Maybe "I Love You" Isn't Bad At AlI

by jemoyed



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Soft Na Jaemin, hopeless romantic na jaemin, mystic renjun, renmin, soft, soft renmin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-08-20
Packaged: 2020-09-19 05:54:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20326183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jemoyed/pseuds/jemoyed
Summary: Maybe Renjun and him could one day dance to the sound of nature, just like the woods. One day they could sing a song, harmonizing so beautifully like the wind and the birds do.





	Maybe "I Love You" Isn't Bad At AlI

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).

> this one is for you vic and i'm really happy to be able to write for you! hopefully you enjoy it uwu
> 
> also sorry if the end sounds a little too rushed :(( i will maybe edit it later one day hhh

The sun, which Jaemin always hated solely for being too bright, was tickling his, now warm, cheeks. He was sitting on the edge of his bed, completely caught up in his thoughts, not noticing the sun trying to wake him up nor how long he has been sitting there already. Gazing into nowhere Jaemin thought of holding the face of a pale boy, while pressing a soft, long kiss on his rosé-like lips. Oh, how beautifully mesmerizing the other looked, being caressed with the hands of his lover. His already red cheeks turning into an even darker red and those shining eyes telling Jaemin to never let go. 

Wishing for all this to ever become reality the boy slowly came back out of the illusion of holding his friend so close to him, that privacy didn’t have to be discussed anymore. Touching his hot cheeks he got embarrassed about the fact he was probably a blushing mess, but as he turned his gaze he soon enough realized the sun has been watching him the whole time. Jaemin exhaled loudly making it clear to himself that he finally needs to get his mind together and talk to Renjun like every other person would do it.

After another five minutes of just sitting on his bed, trying to reflect all those overwhelming thoughts, he decided to finally get a coffee or he would drive insane in just another daydream about his crush. Grabbing his phone from the messy desk, where there was laying a pile of random folders and the few novels he has read about the most uncommon things, he took a ten meters trip to the kitchen. His mother leaning on the counter drinking the coffee she made for herself and Jaemin. 

“Good morning”, the woman chirped, taking just another sip of the drink in which, to the boys dislike, she always poured milk into, “I was already wondering what you were doing. You really took a long time to stand up today.” Jaemin has told her so many times, that coffee is only “real coffee” without milk. Not that he disliked milk, but putting it into his very favorite drink seemed like a crime to him. Though he stopped making his outraged comments about it, because people would call him crazy for only drinking black coffee.

“I guess was just a little too tired today to stand up the second you called me”, Jaemin laughed, knowing he wasn’t the best liar, but it’s not like his mother really cared about it at all. She always tried to start some morning small talk, but he was definitely the last person someone should talk to in the morning. Today was surely not one of his worst days, but normally he would be the grumpy type of morning person unlike his mother was. Besides having an exhausting job and also having to take care of a household she still managed to keep a positive attitude at any time. He admired her for this trait, but he also didn’t really care about changing himself, because just the imagination of talking to people after waking up annoyed him.

For awhile he just stood there, next to his mom, who was gazing outside of the window, where the trees would dance to the music made by the inseparable duo of the wind and the birds. Better than any love story could ever describe the two were harmonizing day and night not doubting the others capability of being an amazing singer. Jaemin admired the trees even more, that always found a way to dance and make it look so original and wonderful. Maybe Renjun and him could one day dance to the sound of nature, just like the woods. One day they could sing a song, harmonizing so beautifully like the wind and the birds do.

Trying to shake off his thoughts about the boy he loved so much, he took out his phone wanting to check if he a got any messages. Just as he saw a message pop up on the screen his mother coughed to get her son’s attention. “I have told you already to not use your phone so often”, she scolded him, shaking her head at the same time, not really getting the purpose of always tapping on that little thing, “just enjoy the view! That’s so much more interesting.” Of course he understood his mother’s annoyance since you could see everyone using it non-stop no matter where they were. They would probably even use it in a cave, not knowing why it wouldn’t work.

So Jaemin just let his thoughts take over him, while leaning at the kitchen counter and looking outside where the ball of nature would take place.

-

Exhausted and seemingly annoyed the boy fell back into his gaming chair, which on one side felt hard but still as if you were falling into a hundred of fluffy pillows just waiting to be cuddled with. In front of Jaemin standing his not so modern monitor showing the lobby of League of Legends where there was a little slide show showing all newly added skins or champions and right below it a quite outstanding button saying “Play”.

Just as the sign lit up again to grab his attention he rolled his eyes and pressed on the tiny cross in the right corner. He had been playing this game for hours now and he didn’t really have a lot of luck today, his teammates being either really stubborn or literally had no plan how to play their champions. Raging a lot was already a routine for everyone playing, but today he felt like it was worse than other days.

Not trying to get caught up too much in his enraged thoughts Jaemin stood up from his comfortable chair walking up to his window, wanting to catch a breath of the nature outside where the sun was currently setting showing it’s most mesmerizing state out of all of them. Sure it was still to bright, but it wasn’t trying to wake up a tired boy out of his daydream, actually it was wishing everyone a good night and to have dreams so memorable and fantastic anyone could wish for, but in the end it was the word of the moon that decided whether your dreams were gonna be like the sun wishes them to be or if it’s gonna create a complete new story that should be told to you.

As Jaemin opened his window the widest it could be he noticed the dog of his neighbor smelling the breath of nature just like he did right at the moment. While he did so he could see the animal observing its surroundings with his ears probably trying to find out who just opened their window so carelessly that it could probably fall off at some point. The dog looked up to the boy who was standing there on the other side with his eyes closed calming down from all the raging and the stressful matches. 

Loud barking brought him back to reality where no Renjun was holding him tight telling him to never leave his side while the older exhaled into the crook of his neck giving him goosebumps all over, before he was about to say these words Jaemin couldn’t even understand the meaning of anymore. Everyone threw them around, always sounding like an empty promise losing it’s actual true feeling that was attached to it once.

With a wagging tail the dog excitedly barked as if he was asking for Jaemins attention just like a human would do, but using actual words. The boy waved at the neighbor’s pet, that then held up it’s paw like it wanted to wave back. In his thoughts he was being so overwhelmed, but not in a bad way, it was more the thought of the dog trying to interact with him using human like signs to talk to him. It was a really lovely sight to look at, which got interrupted by the loud ringing of a phone.

Confusion taking over the boys mind now, who was too surprised by the sound to even notice it was his own phone making clear there was someone trying to call him. Jaemin turned around to see the device on his bed with a lit up screen showing the person calling him and those two very common buttons everyone should have seen at least once in their life. Rushing over to pick the call up he didn’t even look at who it was, that was interrupting his probably most wholesome interaction he ever had. He clicked on the green button holding his phone to his ear. “Hello”, the boy voiced out actually asking an indirect question, wanting to know who he was talking to. 

“OH GOD! Why on the world did you take THAT long”, he heard a way too familiar voice half screaming into his speaker, startling Jaemin. It sounded like he wanted to finish his sentence but he certainly didn’t, which left the latter confused. For what took he that long? Unknown of himself thinking loudly he he let out a soft what making the person on the phone let out a long sigh.

“Do you ever even read the messages you get”, the boy on the other side of Jaemins phone asked. He remembered in the morning there was a notification showing on his phone, but he must have forgotten about it or he would have answered the other one whose name he still couldn’t think of. The voice so familiar, but his mind made no sign of any possible name fitting to it.

“I’m sorry, what”, was the only sentence like thing he could currently bring out being too taken aback by everything happening right now, even tho there wasn’t anything happening besides a phone call the latter was so confused about for no apparent reason. Jaemin shook his head trying to get off the block in his mind, which made it impossible for him to think of anything.

“Oh Jaemin”, the boy said in a soft tone no one could ever imitate, because it was so unique and significant for the other ━ Renjun, it was him that he was talking to and out of all his perfect dreams his reality had to be so imperfect, embarrassing himself in front of his crush. “I asked you something earlier this morning”, Jaemin could hear shuffling from the older, while he finally explained the situation to him, “though you never answered me and now I’m calling you to ask exact this question again.”

The boy who just got out of his confusion was again thrown into a mess of thoughts, not knowing what the latter could possibly want to ask him. Not feeling like he was in any way interesting enough for the other, he just stared at his white wall believing it would give him the answer ━ the answer to everything, but nothing at the same time, because who could answer a question they didn’t know about. The only right explanation he could get was the one from Renjun. “Tell me! What is it”, Jaemin said not too trying to sound pushy, which made him sound rather innocent like he was just a children asking for his parents to continue the story that he found so fascinating.

Renjun coughed twice making it sound like it was a big announcement, which in fact scared the latter a little, even tho there was no way he would say something hurtful or negative to him. Yet he still felt like the other one was currently walking on the thin ice of his heart, feeling like it might shatter any moment, not wanting to stop pounding as fast as a hummingbird's wings could swing. Jaemin let his mind think of any possibility that would end up silencing the excitement he had with just the lightning of a very basic question.

“I wanted to ask if you”, the older started off, exhaling nervously, making the latters heart pound even faster thinking he would die any moment. “Do you possibly, i mean just eventually if you have time of course”, Renjun restarted his first sentence, his voice becoming more shaky with very word. Jaemin heard him breath in very deep, calming down himself before he again started a new sentence, but now without just stopping in the middle.

“Do you want to meet up with me in the park tonight?”

Just as Renjun finished the sentence he closed his eyes, letting the thin ice break, turning into little snowflakes, much more delightful than any flake you could ever find after great snow fell down on earth. A smile formed on the boys face, which was now brighter than the sun could ever shine.

“Yes”, the words slowly formed in his head, not sounding too excited, more like the silent sea covering your legs with water as a brief wave reached you, “I would love to.”

-

Excitement filled Jaemins body, his thoughts stumbling over their own feet like a kid just learning to walk ━ he too was just learning how it felt to go out with someone you love so much your mind won’t stop drifting away every other moment it wasn’t up to anything. He was standing in front of his closet not really being sure of what to wear for this late night date, at least he guessed it was a date, though Renjun had told him so many time that he looks good no matter what. It’s not like he had any fancy looking clothes anyways, so in the end it was just a white shirt tucked in cozy jeans.

Unsure about how to make the last few minutes pass before leaving the house, which his parents were not supposed to notice, he just walked rounds in his room, checking his phone every minute that felt like ten of them went by. It’s like he could feel a clock ticking in his mind, slow like a snail not wanting to finish one minute, like there was no 60 second, making him even more nervous.

Ever since Renjun called two hours ago he felt like melting inside full of that burning excitement to meet his friend, alone, at ten in the evening. Jaemins heart, which first calmed down after his crush asked him out, was now again trying to get the pace of a hummingbird’s wings. The smile on his face hasn’t faded since that meaningful phone call, that he had cursed for interrupting his interaction with the neighbor’s dog at first.

Just as he looked at the clock for the hundredth time in the last few minutes he noticed it was time to go out into the already dark nature, not any possibility of the sun showing even the tiniest bit of itself. He slowly opened the door of his room not wanting to wake up any of his family members while trying to put on his shoes as silently as he could.

Holding the front door knob in his hand, about to open it, he heard shuffling in his parents room, making his heart race out of panic they might have noticed him going around on tiptoes, not wanting to make even a sound so quiet like a mouse would. Jaemin hurriedly opened the door still trying to not close it with a bang like he usually did, because he never really cared enough to not throw it close.

Stepping outside he took a deep breath of the cold night breeze, filling his lungs feeling like the oxygen would tickle him from the inside. He tried to calm down from all his panicking and excitement, but he was just unable to wait to finally hold Renjun close just so he could enjoy the warmth of the others body already making him feel all bubbly. With his smile growing even bigger now he started walking into the direction of the park where the other would wait for him.

He was about to arrive only after five minutes of walking through the sleeping streets of Seoul, that’s when he already saw the beautifully shaped silhouette of his crush standing with his hands in his pockets looking around, trying to find out where Jaemin would come from. The latters thoughts swirling around all the possible words he could say and the things that could eventually embarrass him in front of Renjun ━ he was so afraid of every scenario in his head, but there was no baking out now, this being his chance, one that should not go to waste.

“Jaemin”, he heard his name being shouted, echoing through the streets. Renjun waved at him looking just as excited as Jaemin, who was already shaking not being able to keep all the nervosity in his body anymore. Despite seeing each other frequently there was just another feeling attached to this meeting making it much more special too.

“Am I late yet”, the younger asked, who had already forgotten the time, even though he checked it way too often already.

Finally Jaemin was standing right in front of Renjun, being a smiley mess, bringing light to the place where there was no sun nor lamp shining, making his friend stand in the spotlight. “No, it’s all fine” the boy said, who was noticeably smaller than the other, his hair being blown to the side by the slight wind, “I was just a little early! I couldn’t hold myself at home.”

The laugh coming from Renjun, softly resounding in the others head making him think of how amazingly wonderful his crush was. “Would you mind me taking you to a secret place”, the question sounding mystic to Jaemin, but he didn’t mind, after all his friend had always been the type of guy to love mystery too. He just nodded not losing the smile on his face, which made the other smile back at him.

They were walking down the gravel path, which led through the park in which there were barely any lamps making the moon the only source of light, giving off an even more mystic vibe than all this already had. People were now sleeping to the lullaby of the celestial object, but the two of them were rather enjoying it’s magical presence while they were walking to the secret place Jaemin had no clue of.

The boys arms were brushing against each other, both of them being too afraid to just casually grab the others hand. Just the feeling of Renjun being next to him made Jaemin feel warmth in his whole body, as if he was not outside, where the air was cold, that made him shiver when he only stepped out of his front door. 

Suddenly the latter felt the soft hand of Renjun’s grabbing his, making him feel at a loss of words despite them already walking in complete silence. Jaemin only tightened the grip making sure he wouldn’t let go of it. Inside of his mind there was so much happening, he himself unable to describe only a bit of it. The moment just felt so perfect, like all the times he daydreamed of his friend always being closer to him than before.

At some point Jaemin was dragged over the grass field to a pavilion, which looked like it hasn’t been used in years, hidden behind several bushes and trees. Whoever build this place must have done that at time as mystic as it was right now, because it fit the scenery so well, the latter feeling astonished by all of this.

“Is that the place, you mentioned”, he asked with a voice sounding like he wasn’t able to process the moment and he definitely wasn’t. Nature decorated the place so beautifully, making him think that this could possibly be the center of Seoul’s ballroom of nature, where wind, birds and trees meet, all of them just wanting to love the moment like Jaemin did.

Renjun looked at him as they arrived, now standing right next to the little building. “Yeah, this is a place i sometimes go to”, he paused the sentence for a few seconds just smiling at the other, “when I just need to be for myself.”  
Jaemin was surprised why Renjun would even show him this, something so private, but he seemingly trusted him enough, which made his heart flutter. He showed the older again the brightest smile possible. “I love it”, he said with all honesty, because he truly never saw something more personal and intimate than this place was.

“I’m glad! I really never shared this”, Renjun mentioned while they both sat down on the stone stairs of the pavilion. They were cold making Jaemin shiver for a moment, but it was gone as soon as he looked at their intertwined hands giving them both the warmth they needed, so they wouldn't feel cold.

“Then what makes you share this with me”, it made him wonder, but he found his heart pounding again at the fact, that he had to be someone just as important to Renjun, but he couldn’t believe it, it was just so surreal for him.

Renjun looked straight into Jaemins eyes. “I don’t really know how to say it, so do you mind”, he then shifted his gaze to the others lips. The others heart starting to race even harder now, but he couldn’t think of a single thing ━ his mind just going blank. Jaemin only nodded at Renjun’s question.

He closed his eyes, unknown of the feel a kiss had, because after all Jaemin never had his first kiss, not because he wanted to be something special, but he wanted it to be someone special and he knew Renjun was the person. The person that never left his mind, after the first day they met, the one who made him zone out so much, just because he wanted his daydreams to be reality and now they were becoming exactly this.

He could feel the others breath on his cheeks making his face feel warm and just then their lips met, his heart stopping, just like his breath, unable to do anything, but enjoying whatever was happening.

Suddenly it was cold again, he opened his eyes just to be met with the once of Renjun, who seemed like he wasn’t satisfied yet.

Jaemin really had no clue about how you kissed a person, but there was nothing more he wanted to do right at the moment. He grabbed the cheeks of the pale boy sitting in front of him, pulling him closer, almost no space left between them and placing his lips on the others rosé-like ones he has dreamed of so many times. Everything he could think of being Renjun, the one he loved so much, like there would never be an end to it and maybe, just maybe

“I love you” aren’t bad words at all.


End file.
